FFS Friday - Toxic

Hello and happy Friday to you all!

I know you've missed my poo and spew stories so I have one for you this week.

Saturday started out innocently enough, actually it started out really well because we went into town and met up with Su. We had a lovely morning with no indication of what was to come. Not FFS.

That afternoon things went downhill fast. I suddenly started feeling sick. FFS.

I hadn't eaten anything off but I felt like I was going to be sick. FFS.

I lay down on the couch and fell asleep for a while. Thankfully the kids didn't kill themselves whilst I was asleep. Not FFS.

When I woke up I had gastro. FFS.

Ever had gastro when you have kids to look after? It's not fun. FFS.

Chai stood at the bathroom door watching me spew or poo, dry retching and telling me it was gross, whilst Eljay tried to pull himself up onto the toilet so he could see what was going on. Good times. FFS.

Thankfully I was only spewing and pooing for Saturday afternoon, but I felt sick for a few days. The poor boys didn't get bathed for two days, but at least they were fed. FFS.

Of course this had to happen whilst Tiger was away. FFS.

To my great displeasure Chai can now open the child proof lock on our fridge. FFS.

We put it there to keep him out of the fridge. FFS.

He's now in the fridge constantly. FFS.

Monday was One Of Those Days. FFS.

It started out well, we slept in until 6am which was great, the kids were happy playing so I got some housework done and everything was wonderful. I was feeling a bit better so decided that after two days of being housebound we'd get out of the house and the kids could burn some energy at the park. Not FFS.

I got us all ready, got into the car and Eljay started screaming. Really screaming. FFS.

Halfway to the park he was screaming so much that I turned around and decided we'd go to a park closer to home. FFS.

Then Chai decided he'd start screaming too, at which point I decided we were going home. FFS.

I drove home with both of them screaming. Chai was alternatively yelling and screaming and Eljay was just screaming. FFS.

I don't know why I bother sometimes. FFS.

That afternoon, once Eljay had had a sleep we headed out again. The morning had been lovely and clear, the afternoon was windy and overcast. FFS.

Thankfully it didn't rain whilst we were out so the kids had a great time at the park. Not FFS.

Chai has now decided that he doesn't like it when Eljay makes any noise. FFS.

Eljay makes noise constantly. FFS.

Every time Eljay makes a noise Chai yells at him. FFS.

Every single time. FFS.

Once he's sick of yelling he cries. FFS.

Not a real cry, it's a loud, yelling type of cry. FFS.

It's driving me nucking futs. FFS.

I'm going to buy some noise cancelling headphones so I don't have to listen to it. FFS.

Thursday morning we called the PIL's to see if they were going to visit and they said they weren't coming until next week. Not FFS.

Lunchtime they called and said they were on their way down. FFS.

Thanks for the warning. FFS.

That afternoon Tiger got gastro. FFS.

The PIL's were already halfway through their trip down. FFS.

Last time FIL had gastro he ended up in hospital with heart problems. FFS.

As is it wasn't bad enough that Tiger has gastro, we both now have colds. FFS.

Clearly our house it toxic, I may have to burn it down. Failing that, I'll just disinfect the whole house. FFS.

There concludes my weekly whinge. If you've had any FFS worthy moments, please tell me all about them so that I can laugh at with you. 

If you'd like to read more whinges, head over to Sarah's blog.